Every Valentine’s Day, we take the time to show our appreciation of our loved ones through small gestures of affection. On Valentine’s Day, a card, some flowers, chocolates, or a special dinner can go a long way towards making our spouses and partners feel cared for.

It’s unfortunate, though, that Valentine’s Day is the only day of the year that many people remember to focus on their relationships. It’s human nature to unintentionally take others for granted. Daily life can be so busy, our attention is taken up by our own work, responsibilities, and needs. The truth is, though, that when we take the time to think of the needs of others, everything becomes easier. True harmony and balance can only be achieved at home when the people around us feel recognized and validated. Without that, communication falls apart and relationships suffer.

It’s long been said that strong communication is the foundation of a successful marriage. It’s easy to become self-focused to the point where your partnership suffers. More often than not, it takes a conscious effort to connect with your spouse. The good news is that it’s an investment of time and energy that pays off exponentially.

One of the biggest benefits of being trained in DISC theory that you become immediately more in tune with the personalities and needs of the people in your life. One of the first things that many people do after undergoing DISC training is to have their partners and spouses take the DISC test as well. DISC tests such as the Relationship Report can be very effective in de-mystifying the process of communication. Time and time again, we hear clients say that their relationships, both personal and professional, have been significantly improved by understanding DISC.

As a DISC relationship refresher, here are a few quick tips you can use to create more open and effective communication with the different DISC personality types, no matter what the nature of your relationship is.

When communicating with a D:

  • Be direct and to the point
  • Don’t ramble
  • Talk primarily about solutions, not problems
  • Focus on results

When communicating with an I:

  • Don’t overwhelm them with details
  • Don’t interrupt or dominate the conversation: Give their ideas equal time
  • Include social time
  • Stay positive and optimistic

When communicating with an S:

  • Don’t push or make demands
  • Keep the conversation relaxed and friendly
  • Avoid being excessively confrontational
  • Provide clarifications and clearly defined goals

When communicating with a C:

  • Be specific and explain yourself well
  • Allow plenty of time for discussion
  • Be open and ready to answer questions
  • Resist the urge to criticize
  • Include facts, details, examples, and data when possible

Of course, this is just the tip of the iceberg. DISC can help you understand everything from the values to the thinking style of the people around you, and will give you specific strategies for making the most of that information. It’s like having a built-in relationship coach.


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